Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Randomize
