I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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