She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
