Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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