I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
