the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
