If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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