He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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