We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Randomize