People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
the day after is always just damage control
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
