this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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