allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Randomize
