That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
