you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
