Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
