Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
