Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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