So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Randomize
