I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize
