I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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