My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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