Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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