Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Randomize
