Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
