Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
