you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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