just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Maybe he injected his testicle?
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
