Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
