How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
