Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
