i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
