Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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