he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Do vagina's smell?
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
