He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
