I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
