so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
The Olympian is in my bed
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
