Will you blow on my dice?
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
