I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Randomize
