I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Randomize
