i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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