Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
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