Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
