Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
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