Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Randomize
