She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
