It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
