Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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