I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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