He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
my liver is dry heaving
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
