STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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